Does he think I make this stuff up??

Often I have side conversations with my boss about all the work the hubby and I have done to our house.  And when I say "work we've done to our house" I mean that literally. 

Work WE'VE done.   Not work we've HIRED OUT.

I've made this exceptionally clear to my boss.  Usually in the context of "because we can't afford to have someone else do it." 

But who am I kidding.  He knows exactly how much I make.  I'm sure he's not buying it.  But at least I was pretty sure he was clear on the fact that we are DIYers.

And that I wasn't a wife that sat and watched my hubby do all the work.  I'm a participating kind of wife.  And not in a I'll-help-you-carry-that-dear kind of way either... You get the drift.

So my Admin needed a hole drilled in the top of her desk for computer cords and let's face it -  It was just way easier for me to bring in the drill and bits and do it myself than to wait (and pay) for a guy to come do it for us. 

And so I did.

And I did it before my boss got into the office this morning.

This is the guy that notices NOTHING.  Like the huge new toaster oven that I had ordered for the kitchen, which he didn't want for years because he swore it'd take up too much space on the counter top.  Yeah - he didn't notice it all.  Or when our Marketing Asst. had been out all week on vacation and finally on Friday asked "Is Little Bit out today?"  Uh, she's been out all week....

So today he walks in towards his office, past my door and stops.  Backs up and says "A drill??"

Of all things, on all days he notices the drill on the table in my office. 

"Yes, boss.  It's a drill.  I had to put a hole in New Gal's desk." 

He looked a me, raised an eyebrow, harrumphed and walked away!!!

What did that mean???  Did he think I was making all the "home improvement" stuff up?!?!?! 

I think he was jealous that no one asked him to drill the hole.  You know, him being a man and all....  ; )

My computer is "fixed".. but my hair is not.

And I don't mean "neutered"....  at least I don't think so...

Week before last I had to send my laptop to the mothership to get it upgraded to Windows 7 'cuz it just wasn't cooperating.  And believe it or not, I do  have a job I have to get done on this thing....

I got it back up and running this morning (no more of dealing with the "loaner" computer...  pshaw!)  Within an hour I had to reboot.  I'm still getting an alarming number of "Not Responding" messages.... 

On the bright side - files are opening much faster!!  (as in "I don't have to get out of my chair, take a bathroom break and then maybe my file will have opened"...)

In other news I think I've given up on my morning spinning classes.  Between trying to get in the pool at least three times a week and being required to run 6 days a week for my running group I'm not finding a lot of time where I want to wake up at 5:20am to get to a spinning class. 

And on a related note - really!... MH you'll be happy to know I'm considering purchasing hot rollers.  Only "considering" at this point.  I have not yet purchased.  My rationale?  I've been working out in the evenings which requires me to take a shower at night.  My hair is never dry by the time I go to bed.  (I really hate to use a hairdryer if I don't have to!)  I wake up in the morning with wacky hair.  By "wacky" I don't mean "sticking straight up in the air" (thank god...)  But it will be flat.  Or have weird kinks on my scalp that give those crazy bumps if you try and put it in a ponytail.  (did I mention my hair is a bit past my shoulders now??  Which falls into the "long" category for me.) 

Sooo - I figure if I get hot rollers I can just throw those puppies in while I'm getting ready and look a bit more put together.  Anybody have any experience with doing this?  Am I hoping for a miracle that will never happen?  If so PLEASE tell me before I buy the darn things.  I obviously don't want to spend money if it's not going to work and I DEFINITELY don't need yet another unused hair "thingy" taking up space in my house.

End of an era

Funny lady is retiring.    She gave us her notice last week and her last day will be August 18th.  She's worked here 18 years.

So please forgive me if I go bat-crazy in August.

She looks and acts like she's in her 50's.  The oldest someone thought she was was 63.  Truth is she's 70 and a half.  She deserves to kick back and enjoy the rest of her life.

She's worked her whole life and retiring was a big decision for her.  She told me and my boss at the same time that she was retiring.  She cried three times during our conversation.  I think she's a little mixed about it.

My boss:  So , what are you going to do with all your new free time??
FL:  (without skipping a beat, and through tears...) oh, I think I'll start pole dancing! 
(and continues to smile, laugh and cry at the same time.)

I'm going to miss that sense of humor!!!

wish I was more tech savvy so I could share...

Wednesday I drove to Plattsburgh for a work meeting.  It's actually quite beautiful.  It's on Lake Champlain, 30 miles from Montreal and the weather Wed and Thurs was absolutely gorgeous!

Plus I opt to drive through the Adirondacks to get there instead of an all-interstate route.  Again - gorgeous!  And this time I drove the hubby's Civis si... a little zippy 6-speed with low profile tires and almost 200 HP!!  Oh yeah - MUCH more fun than driving my Jeep!!

Since Platts. is so close to Quebec they get all sorts of Canadian radio stations.  Including the French ones.  Which totally made me laugh in my car.  This is where I wish I were more tech savvy to insert an audio file from a station so you would know what I'm talking about.

I don't speak French.  I didn't take it in HS.  I've only been to Paris once, briefly, as in only a day or so, over 15 years ago.   So to me French is a silky, sexy, romantic language.  It's easy on the ears.  And the few times I've ever heard it spoken that's how it sounds to me.  But I was channel surfing in the car and apparently tuned into a French rock station.  And they were in the middle of some contest or something.  Something NOT sexy.  The DJ was shouting on and on in French.  I could only imagine something like:

"Hurry and call in now!!!  Be caller 10 and win a deluxe trip for two to Hawaii!!!!!  Can you believe it?!?!?  A TRIP TO HAWAII!!!"

Actually I'm sure the DJ was yelling, not shouting.  It was French all right, but it was coarse and hard and just sounded... funny.  Not right at all!!

I wish I could share it with you so you could understand how ridiculous it sounded.  Alas, I can't so I'll share some photos I took instead.

Dinner overlooking the boats on Lake Champlain

Beautiful sunet over the lake

Fields of sunflowers!!!

Why business travel is great... and not so great...

If you travel for you job you understand that getting on a plane and flying all over the US/ world is not really as glamorous as the movies make it seem.  But there definitely are perks - which widely differ depending the company you work for and where they send you. 

Although my company is sending me all over the US in May/ June and it's making my home life crazy it can actually be a mini-vacation.  All I have to do is show up and do my schtick.  If I'm in a nice place I can treat it like I'm really not working (except for the times I'm stuck in a conference room or a convention center...  where I have to be present.)  No getting up with the dogs.  No worrying about what to do for dinner.  No trying to read my book in peace while trying to block out the noise of the tv/ the hubby's music upstairs.  No more vying for my hubby's attention with the tv.  No guilty feeling for not cleaning the kitchen.  You get the idea...   It's just "me time". 

This week I'm in Palm Desert, CA.  And this is me on my deck after our meetings. 
(and those are my fuchsia toes...  let's hope no one from Singapore is going to be stalking my blog after this...)

However, this paradise isn't perfect.  Because I'm at a meeting we still all have dinners we have to go to together.  Last night we didn't have dinner until 8pm ('cuz the guys were golfing... : P  )  That's 11pm for me folks.  Y'all know I can't stay up that late.  I was exhausted.  I gave it the old college try but I literally almost face planted in my nationally recognized prime aged steak......  but then I got back to my hotel and didn't sleep at all.. again....  I'm exhausted right now.  And I don't function well on such little sleep..... 

Unforeseen perks

I'm sitting at my desk thinking about the state of my career. (or current lack of it)  About how I'm antsy to get moving again.  About how I long for a challenge and excitement. 

But I won't deny that this current position has perks.

After years and years of running, stressing, going 175 mph in all my previous jobs, this one is quite slow moving.  I really enjoyed this pace the first few years.  It gave me time to breathe, to relax.  However, in the past few years I recognize that this pace is too slow for me.  I could try and go faster but there are bottlenecks throughout the company that keep me from going my "perfect pace".  The company is just a little too small.

We don't have meetings.  Well, we do but not really.  I might have a meeting, scheduled or not, once, maybe twice a week.  That's it.  (and even those are usually 30 minutes, tops)  Which is a real shift from my previous employer where I had to work 12 - 14 hour days just because my 8 -5 was filled with meetings - and when am I going to actually get my "work" done??

And after reflecting on the lack of meetings, I realize a side perk to this arrangement.  Because I'm not running from meeting to meeting, or trying to get a little work done between meetings, I actually am able to use the restroom whenever I want!

I know I have some queasy bathroom people reading this.  So I apologize.  But this is very important.  Do you know how much happier I am when I'm able to answer my body's call when it's actually calling?!?!?! And not put it on hold for hours?!?!

If you are one of those people that purposefully put your body on hold you really should try and change that.  I know not everyone has the luxury of going whenever the need arises.  I know some of you are teachers and only can sneak away between periods or during lunch and planning.  Or maybe you have an "issue" with going #2 in a public bathroom.  (I know who you are...)  Or maybe you hold it because your husband is home....  (I think I now know there are at least two of you that do this, not just you... you know who I'm talking about...)

I don't care if you play the radio loudly and use a ton-o-air freshener in order to make you more comfy while in the presence of others in your house.  But I think if you get past these "issues" you will find yourself relaxed and happier overall.  Really.  I do.  Because I know I was a bitchy mess when my work schedule dictated my "other" schedule.

Just try it.  It's liberating!

Editors Update:  I was just informed by one of my readers that she may not "toot" in front of her hubby, even though they've been married over a decade, but she will "do her business" while he is in the house.  Of course she also thinks I was referring to her in the aforementioned post....  but I will not confirm nor deny it.

I get asked that a lot

We had a potential  new sales rep in the office today for interviews.  I got to interview her but my job was really more just to chat her up.  See how she "is".  You know, "girl talk". 

She asked me many questions but the one that got her a little sidetracked was when she asked me about my career background.  I explained I had been in consumer goods and worked for some divisions of Newell Rubbermaid, Waterpik, etc....  The question really came up in regards to product pricing because consumer goods pricing is straight forward as compared to my current industry.

I'm guessing she's a shopping kinda girl because she immediately asked me "What are the mark ups at Macy's and places like that??  I've always wondered!!!"

I told her and I'm going to tell you.  Because I know we're all bargain shoppers.  And because we're all bargain shoppers I'm confident that you'll be able to keep up with my explanation that contains a lot of percentages....

Department stores and big box stores usually have a 50% (or more) markup.  NEVER buy anything at one of these stores that isn't on sale.  That said, I wouldn't even venture to buy anything at these stores unless it's one heluva sale, at that... like at least 50% off or more.

Wal-Mart - usually have smaller mark ups - between 25 - 45%.  The issue with WM is that they demand such low prices from their suppliers that it's not uncommon for a supplier to lose money on a product just to get in WM.  'Cuz once you've got something in there you're more likely to get something else - hopefully something you actually can make some money.  So when you shop at WM know you're most likely getting the best deal (and if WM finds out the supplier isn't giving them the best deal they'll drop 'em like a hot potato).

Target takes higher mark ups than WM, but lower than department stores.  I'm thinking around 30 - 45%.  And although they want great prices from their suppliers too I'm not aware of them pushing them quite as hard as WM.  The way WM and Target keep from treading on each other's feet is to have suppliers provide them with "Target" or "WM" specific products, designs, or even packaging.

And the warehouse stores are almost always your best best.  Granted you do need to do your due diligence since you might not get a deal on toilet paper but do expect to get the best deal on electronics and some other items.  However, these rules do not apply to food because 1) I'm not from that industry and not sure of their usual margins (although I've always heard grocery margins are very, very low) and 2) it doesn't make sense for every household to purchase three years worth of vinegar just so you can get it for $0.10 an ounce... 

Your other best best at a warehouse stores - jewelry.  I tried to explain this to the hubby when we discussed engagement rings years ago.  But he wouldn't have any of it.  The stigma of buying a diamond at Sam's was too much for him to bear.  But why not???  Diamonds are all certified on a universal scale.  So you know exactly what you're getting....  I didn't care if my ring came from Sam's!!  (as a matter of fact, you know what you're going to spend on a diamond  - but you can get a bigger one from a warehouse store...)

Here are a few caveats:

• I haven't worked in consumer goods for the past 4.5 years.  So things may have changed.  But I doubt it.  If department stores took smaller margins in the past few years it probably had more to do with the economy, not a trend they expect to continue.
• These are extreme generalizations.  And margins differ within a store depending on the actual items/ department.  Grocery items are going to get much lower margin than vacuum cleaners.  (think sell through volume...  the faster something is likely to turn on the shelf the lower the expected margin at discount stores.  That doesn't necessarily hold true to department and box stores, though...)
• Kohl's, JCPenny and the like are sometimes grouped as department stores, but take lower margins.   (they have a category of their own)  They are generally a good bet if you like to shop there.  But again, I would highly advise to only buy items on sale. 
• Remember - all stores (except WM, Target, warehouses) purposely mark up regular prices pretty high with the expectation that they have a scheduled sale in which they will lower the price to a point they know the item will move. They bank their margins on the sale price, not the regular price. So remember that regular priced items essentially have a "sale mark up" in them. 
• There are certain brands that demand an MSRP.  have you ever tried to bargain shop for Oakleys?  How about an iPod?  The only bargains you will find on these name brands are those styles that have been discontinued.  Stores are not allowed to mark them down.  If they do they will lose their "privilege" of carrying that brand.

So there you have it kids.  The secrest of retail.  None of it probably comes as a surprise. 

Disaster Averted!

It's a quiet afternoon here in the Workplace.  The kind of boring/ sleepy afternoon that happens, on occasion, in some offices.  I was sitting here at my desk, sneakingly reading an eBook when my head nodded, my rings clanked against my keyboard... and I WOKE UP!

I seriously just nodded off at my desk!  Thank goodness my rings clanked or else I might have ended up out of my chair and on the floor!

And now I'm officially awake.

Ugh!!

Have you ever had a shi-tac-u-lous day???  I'm having one.  And I mean that in every sarcastic sense of the word.  (If you consider that a word.)

The big man is on my shit list today.  I won't name names but it's not the hubby, my dad or God. 

Our "relationship" is one of "he says, I do".  I used to be more of a fighter for my own thoughts and ideas but I learned long ago it's not worth the fight.  (seeing why I'm so terribly bored???) 

I'd had it today.  I went in to his office to get clarification on something.  I figured we'd do the "dance" that we always do.  It goes something like this:

• I waltz in and explain a situation.
• He foxtrots back with "What's your recommendation?"
• I salsa forward with "I suggest....."
• And he tangos over to tell me what he really wants done (which rarely agrees with my suggestion)
• And I chachacha right out of his office thinking "if you just told me what you wanted to do in the first place, like you always do, we could dispense will all this time-consuming shit".

So I gave him my suggestion solely based on his direction in such matters in the past. However, that's not the directive he gives me back.  The direction he gave me came completely out of left field (as compared to his previous comments over the last, say, FOUR years..)  When I asked for further explanation/ clarification ('cuz this was all new to me folks!) he said in not-the-exact-words "Your the marketing director you figure it out".

Uh oh.  Two whammies within 60 seconds of each other.  1) Completely surprising me with his answer (not in a good way) and 2) touching a soft soft about my "position" here.

I immediately shot back "I'm NOT a director, I'm only a manager!!" because I'm still pissed about something related to that.  But I won't digress and get into all the details here.  However if you're going to tell me to "act" like a director (which I used to be at my old compnay, BTW...) then let me do my frickin' job!  But alas, I'm only a manager so I will do as I'm treated... and paid.  After I said that he started getting testy and I shot back with "You don't listen to my suggestions so why don't you just tell me what you want to do!"

I'm not sure that even penetrated his skull.  He gave me some look - which he gives me when he's pissed/ frustrated/ not in the mood to explain something (so apparently I'm a mind reader too!  add that to my "manager" description!!) and then proceeded to keep talking.  I should clarify that "the look" is something akin to facially telling me that I can't do my job.  My response to that - I'd happily do my job IF YOU'D LET ME! 

UGH!!

Whatever.

People, get your shit together, please.

I said "please".  Doesn't that count for something???

Today I have apologized to people on behalf of other people.    As in "I'm sorry I put you through this but my boss screwed up thus wrecking the smooth process for all the rest of us peons.  But since it's coming from me I'll be the one to apologize."  'Cuz trust me folks - my boss ain't apologizin'

And to the rep that lost the samples I sent him over TWO weeks ago for his "special important" meeting....  If it was so special why didn't you take better care of your samples??  And no, I can't just overnight you more.  See, I have to get them from Canada.  I don't sit atop a pile-o-samples of new products here in my office.  This is a new product and not yet launched so I have to get it from the source.  But alas, marketing always answers to sales so I still bend over backwards to get him what he needs.  Long story short - 15 emails later back and forth to Canada - they can send him the samples directly but it won't get there until Wed. morning.  (since today's Tuesday)

• But the rep said his meeting is early Wed. so that won't work. 
• I call the rep to explaing this to him and after a lot of "who's on first" he realizes his meeting isn't until THURSDAY morning. 
• I'm back at email saying "Game on people.  He had his dates wrong!" 
• Only to then get a call from his manager saying "don't send them it'll cost a fortune and that's what he gets for losing them in the first place." 
• So I email Canada "Game off - his manager said so"
• And then I get an email from the manager saying "still send them, just send ground"  Game on!!!!!
• And finally I get a voicemail from the rep (because for some reason he has an  aversion to calling me in the office and always calls me on my cell and leaves a message....) that he has, indeed, found his original samples and now requires none from Canada.
• So I'm back at email apologizing to the guys in Canada (I have a mental image of little elves running around the mail room*) and tell them finally "game off.  for real this time."

ARE YOU FRICKIN' KIDDING ME?!?!?!?!?

Yes, this is how I spent my afternoon - dealing with stupid people.  I would like to request that everyone get a good might's sleep tonight so as not to have a repeat of this tomorrow.

Please and thank you.

*I would like to note that I do not, in any way, think of Canadians as elves.  It's just that elves seem so productive and live in a cold climate.  I'm sure this explains my random association.  I'm sure of it.