Sensuous Cuisine and a Senile Canine

BACKGROUND:
I love the hubby dearly but the one constant "discussions" in our marriage over the past *almost* seven years has been his lack of participation in the kitchen.  As in - he doesn't cook.  Notice I didn't say he "can't" cook.  He just won't.  But when he does he's fabulous at it!  (which just gets me madder 'cuz it proves he's quite competent in the kitchen.  But I digress...)  In the course of our marriage he's cooked me dinner less than 10 times.  (this does not include ordering out or making pasta and throwing jarred sauce on it.)

STORY:
So for Valentine's Day, which we really had to celebrate this weekend since we were busy last weekend and Monday, the hubby said he was going to cook me dinner!!  To me, that's the BEST GIFT EVER!!!!  I don't need anything fancy.  Just him taking time to look up a recipe, getting the ingredients and making the effort meant so much to me.  He decided he wanted to try to make an Indian dish since he loved the chicken curry he had at the Indian restaurant we went to on my birthday.  I said "go for it"!!!  He looked up a recipe online, went through the kitchen to see if we had ingredients, the whole bit!!! 

As we were making the grocery list he showed me his recipe for his chicken curry.  I asked what else he was making with it.  Apparently he was sooo proud that he came up with that recipe he didn't think he had to make anything else!  So I flipped through an Indian cookbook I had and found a spinach and split pea side dish.  But since I only had froze spinach and lentils, not split peas (I wanted to use up what I already had) I volunteered to make this dish since it required major modification to the printed recipe.

Later that evening I cleaned up the kitchen as we all know it's best to work in a clean environment.  Plus we have a "one butt" kitchen and at some point we both were going to be around the stove and we needed all the room possible.  So to that end we had to give the dogs each a "special treat".  One of those chewies that would take them a looong time to eat to keep them out of our way.  They both sat on the floor in the dining room - on the edge of the kitchen - eating their treats.  That way they could see us, be close to us but out of the way.  Each time they might try to get up we'd give them the "stay" hand to keep them there.  They must have realized we were doing serious work in the kitchen because even though they finished their treats they stayed right there and behaved.  Well, for a while...

The hubby was well into making his chicken curry and the kitchen smelled WONDERFUL!!  We were, for the first time, probably ever, working so well together in the kitchen.  I was also in the middle of making my modified spinach and lentils. In other words - we both were actively cooking in the kitchen - when the hubby  looked at me at the sink and said " Uh oh!!!  Liam!!! Get Liam!!"

I looked around and Liam had gotten up from his spot on the floor and was walking through the kitchen to the back door, POOPING on the kitchen floor as he went!!

AGH!!!!!!!

I'd like to say I instantly reacted but I didn't.  I panicked.  I had to stop and figure out what was going on and what I had to do.  The hubby couldn't stop what he was doing but I could so I quickly went and washed my hands, and ran to the back door to let him out.  Then ran back to the kitchen, grabbed poop bags and started cleaning up his mess.  YUCK!! The wonderful Indian aromas were now overpowered by dog poo!  I admit, there were some unsavory words coming out of my mouth as I was cleaning up the mess.... 

I was P-I-S-T, pissed!  The hubby was trying to talk me down from my sudden burst of anger.  The dog is old, he can't help it, he doesn't realize what he's doing, etc...  But it really wasn't helping.  I finally get my hubby to make me dinner and the dog poops in the kitchen?!?!  REALLY?!?!

Finally I calmed down, finished cleaning the mess and let the dog back in.  Then eventually the hubby confessed a little while earlier that Liam tried to get up and he told him to stay.  Liam probably was trying to get up to go to the door because he had to go.  But being a Golden Retriever, and living to please their humans, he laid back down and stayed there like he was told.  Finally he probably couldn't hold it anymore and just got up and couldn't make it to the door....  Poor dog...

Needless to say we got things calmed back down after "the incident", finished cooking and had a fabulous dinner of chicken curry, spinach and lentils with basmati rice and naan.  Yumm!!!